2011

It's less than half a month before the end of 2011. Many events have happened in this year, almost every major thing that could happen to everyone's life has happened to me. Studies, career, relationships, and friendships, and most importantly, family.

I have graduated from National University of Singapore, with a Bachelor Degree in Chemical Engineering. Four years in Engineering has taught me to always try to solve problems whenever possible. It has also taught me about life in the working world, especially during my six-month Industrial Attachment. I'm quite sure I would not like a job where I have to be stucked at my desk 24/7, hence I chose a job where I have to walk around and talk for at least half of my day - teaching. Of course I have made several good friends, especially during the completion of my design project.

I went to Amsterdam, Belgium, France, England and Scotland for my graduation trip with Mark and Joseph. That was really an eye opener, and a fantastic trip with good company. I managed to meet up with three best friends - Lim Zhi, Wei Yann, and Chin Yik - during the trip, and of course it has been a while since I last met them. It was a good catching-up, after such a long parting where I can't even remember how long was it.

Teaching in a Singapore secondary school for one month of course is also an extraordinary experience. That's where I met Jon, someone whom I am able to relate the most after I came to Singapore for the past 7 years. I had to choose between friendship and relationship, and it seemed that I have chosen friendship, and reluctantly accepted the fact that I will lose the relationship that I have been in for three years. It was a very painful and despairing experience, and I'm not even sure whether I have had let it go totally.

Christmas is coming, and soon it will be the time with my family again. Somehow I have started to miss my family. Soon I will be back, soon...

It's been a while...

It's been a while since I last wrote anything here. About a year I guess...

I have been thinking about what I want out of my life. Well, you know, this is not the kind of thing you ponder everyday, but once in a while, it will pop up in your head and remind you of what you would want to do in five, or ten years down the road.

I'm graduating soon. It's time to look for a job. Alternatively, look for a course for further studies (though that would be one of my last few choices). It will look like a rat race all over again. Get good results, find a good job, do your best in what you are doing. Yet I feel life is so much more than that. I don't want to end up in a rat race, where what people think of is success in academics, success in work. And really, success in life is quite a subjective matter isn't it? So then again, everyone has got a different opinion in what is success in life, and hence whatever that everyone else says " You should..." is just advice. Advice is something we should consider, but should not follow blindly.

Then again, am I really sure this is what I want? Nobody will know, not even ourselves.

隐忧

三年的隐忧，今天终于舒缓了。一直为某个人担忧，今天隐约得知他有了新的方向，也总算可以告诉自己，是时候放下了。

是真的舒缓了吗，还是自己骗自己？也许，无意中，我已失去了一个知己。

辞职

辞职这件事，大概很多人都知道了吧！在连上班都还没正式，就把公司给裁了。理由很简单，因为不合理的工作时间，而要我们牺牲上课的机会，再加上还要我们教小学生的补习班。当然还有很多不能明言的理由，但那些都已经不重要了。是那间公司把大学生当傻瓜，还是老板想滥用大学实习生的制度？我想，两个都是。他们说，他们请大学生已经有十年的历史了，这十年来还不曾有人埋怨，这还真让人生气。就让他们看看今天的大学生吧，别认为大学生都是书呆子。

这一年的一切计划，又得从新策划了。真的很累人。

Holiday

Finally it's time to have holiday. Today I've got all the free time in the world, but my wallet was left with only 5 dollars. Emergency call back to home, and of course, family is still the best place when there is nothing to fall back on.

Went to settle some medals and certificates problem, and then straight down to Plaza Singapura to look for working clothes. Sadly to say, the price for the shirts here are way too expensive especially if I were to convert back to Malaysia Ringgit, so after about one hour of lazing around, I headed down to Bugis where there are more departmental stores and where there is the famous Bugis Village. Search through the whole departmental store, can't seem to find any good blouse, and there left the only choice. Finally managed to find one store that sells office wear after two hours of searching, and got two shirts for thirty-six bucks, and the quality is amazing.

Going to take part in a dance competition this weekend, not sure why I am not having the nervous feeling even though it's our first standard ballroom competition (have been taking part in latin ballroom for the one and a half year). Got all my costumes and makeup ready, it's just a a matter of enjoying the dance now. I guess we have that trained long ago, can't say we are good at it though.

生气

今天头疼了一整天。因为早上被逼起床得太早，后来睡了整个早上，也无法让头疼消失。其中的理由，真的很不想说，只有两个字：生气。

本来打算复习一整个下午，却因为生气，而耽误了好久好久。。。

总是觉得

心很疼。

叹气

不知道是不是选错了科系，怎么感觉上自己不太喜欢？这个星期比任何一个星期都还要忙，功课限期与考试都在这个星期，大学的教授也真是的。。。